The heart of Texas?

Dear Texas,

Boy, you really dodged a bullet! Congratulations on approving proposition two, thereby writing into the constitution of your great state that marriage can exist solely between one man and one woman. It was a tight election with the margin of victory being a mere 48%, but you pulled through and showed us all how your state should continue to be a shining example of what this nation can achieve.

Beware - there will be some who say that drafting, putting to a vote and passing a law which already existed was a waste of time and capital, but what do they know? After all, it's not as though you have better things on which to spend the money. You may be second in the nation when it comes to teen pregnancies, but who's to say that's a bad thing - after all, babies are always good, right? Besides, you're doing your best to fight that problem by telling teenagers that they shouldn't have sex - I can't possibly see where that might fail.

What do people expect you to do - spend more money on education to fix the fact that you have the tenth highest high-school drop-out rate in the nation? I think our president proved a few years back that fixing that problem doesn't require spending money, just creatively adjusting the statistics a bit. What you need is a return to old-fashioned book-cooking.

And so what if you also have the tenth highest unemployment in the nation? When was the last time that spending money stimulated an economy and created jobs, huh? Besides, that number's gone up lately thanks to a little storm that hit Louisiana and Mississippi and did away with a handful of jobs there. Clearly all we need are a few more natural disasters and you'll be flirting with the high teens!

And about your crime rating - I wouldn't sweat the fact that only four states have higher rates of crime than you. After all, what could money buy that would help with that? Policemen already make millions (if you add all their salaries up) and it's not like their jobs are difficult or dangerous - I'm sure they wouldn't have accepted a raise anyway.

The point is that you as a state have realized that it's not crime, unemployment, terrorism, or a failing education system that threaten to tear our society apart - it's the idea of two men or two women getting married. Besides - how can you not agree with a law supported by one of this nations oldest organizations? I think we can all agree that while the rest of the world looks at you with disdain and rolls their eyes at your tactics, when homosexual couples revolt and conquer their puny countries - you'll have the last laugh.

So thank you Texas - thank you for continuing to prove the fundamental flaw with democracy: the average person has no idea what is best for the country as a whole. While every state does it - you do it with flare.

Never less yours than now,

Nicholas